

In the prison of my mind
I sing a song, and try to find
A reason to be kind
Simply gazing through this time
Almost thinking it was a crime
I must admit it was sublime
The fire that Hellfire brings to attack
Hypnosis may refine my hidden thoughts
But your poison will not grant me no justice
I must not tire, I must burn to the wire.
Donโt call me a liar, when one still must suffer
A brief explanation is all I ask
But it seems to be too big of a task
Unveil your mask, and bask in the truth
Looking for Inspiration with desperation
Taking time to infect my abrasion
I feel like Iโve been left on this station
To linger lonely in a some what sensation
Ever waited so long just to discover you donโt belong?
Questions buried in loneliness, but not the type of lonely one would assume. Itโs a loneliness because no one understands.
This rewinding in my head going over every word that you said
Sing a song to make everything go along
Will I always be in the shadows teasing like black widows
Looking out of the windows, my heart shows
Closeness when still faraway
Iโm sad
But youโre with the sunshine
And thatโs okay
โ Stay there
I donโt know how I live with this regret
Maybe if I wish to forget instead of to reset
I might find peace in the depths of my upset
Always I have struggled dreaming of what I should get
One of the saddest who has seen the happiest in her life
Propelling to the top of the food chain
And downgraded some time after
Feathers and treasures bend through the light
All the lies that someone sent
Swept under the carpet
But never forgotten
The weight pressing on my lungs
Expressing the essence that leaves me lush
Waiting, and waiting for a never
Stopping and starting forever
Glance at the light, Iโm never in the dark
Was I supposed to share that part
A lot has kept me apart
From the social start
Iโm not lonely in the way you think
Iโm lonely in the way because not many understand
But do you understand?
Oceans made from the tears you wept
Cutting edge back through the nights I slept
Am I in your debt or are you in mine?
Maybe if I never knew Iโd be fine
But I want to know, I want to know whatโs true
Ultimately can I believe in you
Because Iโm unsure if your words are true
I canโt withstand the extent of my long lost thought
Nail it down like a treasure begging to be kept
Iโm trending on the sentiment of my mind
Cross roading through the fast thoughts
Blinking, breathing deep
I canโt watch you weep, and I cannot sleep
I opened my eyes to be greeted with lies
Injected with insincerity, my heart cries
As my brain tries to float away
Emptying into oblivion
Painstaking undo this tracking
Iโm bombarded by avalanches
Thoughts confused with fiction
Or is it words whispered in lies
Have mercy on me
I did not know firstly
And secondly Iโm broken
A temper framed like a time bomb
Desperately waiting, dreaming for the shit to hit the fan
Iโm still trying not to be weak
Being the opposite of what they seek
Everlasting breath
moves through the millennium
Broken hearts surround where it starts
But nothing can control those parts
Your tentacles left me in shambles
Tightening around me
Breaking me apart
I should of known from the start
That you would break my heart
Your voice it rambles inside my head
But Maybe I should break free instead
I think constantly, going over and over in my head. Pressure building to expand. No oneโs giving in, am I believing the truth or is my mind lying to me. Only one can say.
Bloomed as I became doomed
My minds racing like itโs vroomed
Can I handle what I asked for?
My heads about to explode
Dressed and begging to implode
Let honesty breathe, and decency leave
Doomsday gloom on a dusty figurine
Record runs wild looping uncontrolled
Singing aimlessly into the air
Making my skin ride bare
Favouring the instant heartache
Dreaming of a lasting blood bank
The devil plays a horrid prank
Dividing me into an alluring pain
Nothing seems seamless
Nothing feels needless
But something craves loveless
I see you in my dreams,
My hair flows like streams,
Lonely as such it seems,
My heart bursts and steams,
Grown so far from our teens,
Desperate to wipe out my screens,
I like how my heart beams,
Are you sure you know what that means?
Itโs frosty in the fog of my mind, clouds bruise against my skull. Looking blankly at the wall, judging time wrong. Beckoning for a reason to survive. The depression is like poison in my veins, which makes me dangerously poisonous. Sometimes itโs best for others to stay away.
Basking on your thrown of lies, terrible brutal cries cemented in a fellow heart. Mine breaks for hers.
I see your face, itโs so out of place
Like a Picasso, dented and fragmented
But the colour is so intense, and it just doesnโt make sense.
Thereโs just something in the way you overrate me, things that maybe I donโt live up to, but it makes me smile. Every pattern draws into oblivion โ the past, and into the future. Most of my words go unspoken, because honestly, Iโm unsure of myself. Iโm desperate to find a truth in a delusion, everything could just pass as coincidental. The messages that I feel are sent to me may not be a message for me, maybe itโs just fiction my mind wrote.ย
A crowded path as a lonely craft, stationed for impact. Thereโs no way Iโm coming out intact, desperate for contact. My mind burrows oh so far within itself. I wonder through myself to find my lonely path. Only to be transformed into a bottomless craft destined for impact.ย
Take a step back, and deny the truth
Desperate for the proof
Opening my eyes to my unseen youth
Poison buries my body into an unrelenting shape
Taking every precaution to escape
Coming out with nothing but a scrape
Underlining every word that could be truth
Always looking for some sort of proof
Reminiscing on my youth
Bending so unruly out of shape
Desperate for any kind of escape
All thatโs left is this awful scrape
Give me clarity in this serenity
My self control makes me lose control
Instinct overrides logic
My heart is made of glass and as it slides through my fingers it shatters on the concrete
The glass cuts my feet as I try to put the pieces back together.
But maybe itโs too lateโฆ
My brain runs wild with every scent of whatโs meant to be. My heart breaks for my past, living in the lonely state that never gets better. Sometimes I wonder if I did one thing differently, would everything change. I relive the past over, and over – contemplating my choices. Choices that may have been for the best, but fill me with pain.
Torching the path through my mind, taking my time. Breathing every breath as if itโs my last. Entering the Time Machine to my past. Everything moves so fast. Unlocked memories, and unboned rarities – nothing can become unstuck, especially our past.
I feel the moonlight gazing through my window
I donโt see it, but I know itโs there
And I know that means itโs the dark time of day.
Singing the sad song thatโs stuck in my head
I Lay straight, and untouched in my bed.
My breath is simmering in a lonely way,
I begin Dreaming of a sunshine day.
Maybe one day Iโll be free, Iโll be me
Someone Iโm still yet to find
But I do know Iโll always be kind
Thoughts flow by slow, then thoughts fly by fast
Emptying everything I have into the vast awareness
My mind seems to lean towards the depress
But I know Iโll always be kind
Am I insane, or does it say my name. Listening cautiously, interestingly my attention is drawn. Love to be sworn, stung by a snake. A liars path did you take? Or am I just insane, the pattern remains. Going in circles, waiting for the proof.
Never, ever would I think Iโd forget.
Forgive, sureโฆBut forget, no.
Iโm wandering through a forest in my mind
Blinking softly as I move through the trees
No one can stop me from reliving my past mistakes
Nothing can ease the pain of these regrets
The weight is almost to much to bare
Taking every step like maybe youโll still care
I was never the one who was able to share
Reminiscing on the revenge in your glare
Iโve never been so paralysed here in paradise
Gloomy storms begin to brew through my mind
Paradise feels now so far away
Trembling for peace, I begin to decease
Sunshine on a blue day
Feels so weird to say
Everyoneโs got their way
Iโd beg you just to stay
My skin begins to Fray
My mind decides to play
Everyone seems to betray
Ready for take-off, but my wings are broken
Taking each step slowly so I donโt fall
Never have I been as taken as now
I wish I could take your hand, and it will all be okay
I wish things could be different,
Maybe in another life, or another time.
Afternoons slip into mornings and the air feels so calm as your breathing it in, just to say what will come of today?
And a grey cloud hovers above my head, rain empties from the cloud making the tears rolling down my face less obvious.
And then morning slips into afternoon.
Whatโs left in the unsaid
Dampening beneath my breath
Always frozen, always burning
Never ending turning,
taken by a stream of tears
Lost beneath the current
Eliminating me, Iโm drowning
Iโd transport my thoughts if I could
Iโd send them to a place,
Where bad thoughts donโt hurt
Waking only to find Iโm lost
Trembling in the way I tossed
No one feels my emotion
Going through the motions
Never ending taking place
Taking breath in every case
Solitary blames my only way
Begging for you just to say
Whistle in the moonlight
A song sleepless in the night
Forever chasing you
Forever losing you
Long lost on an empty frost
At what cost will I become tossed
In the recycling, I am recycled
Sliding, scraping away
Deafened by the sound my heart decides to be its prey.
Cracking under the pressure, no hope to measure
I blink once, then twice – but thereโs nothing nice about it
Nothing compares, nothing ever declares
Iโm Frozen in a bucket of tears
Peeling in poison
Breaking my back to understand whatโs wrong with me.
Thereโs not even a tiny glimmer of hope
Iโm just lonely in my quest to liveย