

Iβm still trying not to be weak
Being the opposite of what they seek
Everlasting breath
moves through the millennium
Broken hearts surround where it starts
But nothing can control those parts
Your tentacles left me in shambles
Tightening around me
Breaking me apart
I should of known from the start
That you would break my heart
Your voice it rambles inside my head
But Maybe I should break free instead
I think constantly, going over and over in my head. Pressure building to expand. No oneβs giving in, am I believing the truth or is my mind lying to me. Only one can say.
Bloomed as I became doomed
My minds racing like itβs vroomed
Can I handle what I asked for?
My heads about to explode
Dressed and begging to implode
Let honesty breathe, and decency leave
Doomsday gloom on a dusty figurine
Record runs wild looping uncontrolled
Singing aimlessly into the air
Making my skin ride bare
Favouring the instant heartache
Dreaming of a lasting blood bank
The devil plays a horrid prank
Dividing me into an alluring pain
Nothing seems seamless
Nothing feels needless
But something craves loveless
I see you in my dreams,
My hair flows like streams,
Lonely as such it seems,
My heart bursts and steams,
Grown so far from our teens,
Desperate to wipe out my screens,
I like how my heart beams,
Are you sure you know what that means?
Itβs frosty in the fog of my mind, clouds bruise against my skull. Looking blankly at the wall, judging time wrong. Beckoning for a reason to survive. The depression is like poison in my veins, which makes me dangerously poisonous. Sometimes itβs best for others to stay away.
Basking on your thrown of lies, terrible brutal cries cemented in a fellow heart. Mine breaks for hers.
I see your face, itβs so out of place
Like a Picasso, dented and fragmented
But the colour is so intense, and it just doesnβt make sense.
Thereβs just something in the way you overrate me, things that maybe I donβt live up to, but it makes me smile. Every pattern draws into oblivion β the past, and into the future. Most of my words go unspoken, because honestly, Iβm unsure of myself. Iβm desperate to find a truth in a delusion, everything could just pass as coincidental. The messages that I feel are sent to me may not be a message for me, maybe itβs just fiction my mind wrote.Β
A crowded path as a lonely craft, stationed for impact. Thereβs no way Iβm coming out intact, desperate for contact. My mind burrows oh so far within itself. I wonder through myself to find my lonely path. Only to be transformed into a bottomless craft destined for impact.Β
Take a step back, and deny the truth
Desperate for the proof
Opening my eyes to my unseen youth
Poison buries my body into an unrelenting shape
Taking every precaution to escape
Coming out with nothing but a scrape
Underlining every word that could be truth
Always looking for some sort of proof
Reminiscing on my youth
Bending so unruly out of shape
Desperate for any kind of escape
All thatβs left is this awful scrape
Give me clarity in this serenity
My self control makes me lose control
Instinct overrides logic
My heart is made of glass and as it slides through my fingers it shatters on the concrete
The glass cuts my feet as I try to put the pieces back together.
But maybe itβs too lateβ¦
My brain runs wild with every scent of whatβs meant to be. My heart breaks for my past, living in the lonely state that never gets better. Sometimes I wonder if I did one thing differently, would everything change. I relive the past over, and over – contemplating my choices. Choices that may have been for the best, but fill me with pain.
Torching the path through my mind, taking my time. Breathing every breath as if itβs my last. Entering the Time Machine to my past. Everything moves so fast. Unlocked memories, and unboned rarities – nothing can become unstuck, especially our past.
I feel the moonlight gazing through my window
I donβt see it, but I know itβs there
And I know that means itβs the dark time of day.
Singing the sad song thatβs stuck in my head
I Lay straight, and untouched in my bed.
My breath is simmering in a lonely way,
I begin Dreaming of a sunshine day.
Maybe one day Iβll be free, Iβll be me
Someone Iβm still yet to find
But I do know Iβll always be kind
Thoughts flow by slow, then thoughts fly by fast
Emptying everything I have into the vast awareness
My mind seems to lean towards the depress
But I know Iβll always be kind
Am I insane, or does it say my name. Listening cautiously, interestingly my attention is drawn. Love to be sworn, stung by a snake. A liars path did you take? Or am I just insane, the pattern remains. Going in circles, waiting for the proof.
Never, ever would I think Iβd forget.
Forgive, sureβ¦But forget, no.
Iβm wandering through a forest in my mind
Blinking softly as I move through the trees
No one can stop me from reliving my past mistakes
Nothing can ease the pain of these regrets
The weight is almost to much to bare
Taking every step like maybe youβll still care
I was never the one who was able to share
Reminiscing on the revenge in your glare
Iβve never been so paralysed here in paradise
Gloomy storms begin to brew through my mind
Paradise feels now so far away
Trembling for peace, I begin to decease
Sunshine on a blue day
Feels so weird to say
Everyoneβs got their way
Iβd beg you just to stay
My skin begins to Fray
My mind decides to play
Everyone seems to betray
Ready for take-off, but my wings are broken
Taking each step slowly so I donβt fall
Never have I been as taken as now
I wish I could take your hand, and it will all be okay
I wish things could be different,
Maybe in another life, or another time.
Afternoons slip into mornings and the air feels so calm as your breathing it in, just to say what will come of today?
And a grey cloud hovers above my head, rain empties from the cloud making the tears rolling down my face less obvious.
And then morning slips into afternoon.
Whatβs left in the unsaid
Dampening beneath my breath
Always frozen, always burning
Never ending turning,
taken by a stream of tears
Lost beneath the current
Eliminating me, Iβm drowning
Iβd transport my thoughts if I could
Iβd send them to a place,
Where bad thoughts donβt hurt
Waking only to find Iβm lost
Trembling in the way I tossed
No one feels my emotion
Going through the motions
Never ending taking place
Taking breath in every case
Solitary blames my only way
Begging for you just to say
Whistle in the moonlight
A song sleepless in the night
Forever chasing you
Forever losing you
Long lost on an empty frost
At what cost will I become tossed
In the recycling, I am recycled
Sliding, scraping away
Deafened by the sound my heart decides to be its prey.
Cracking under the pressure, no hope to measure
I blink once, then twice – but thereβs nothing nice about it
Nothing compares, nothing ever declares
Iβm Frozen in a bucket of tears
Peeling in poison
Breaking my back to understand whatβs wrong with me.
Thereβs not even a tiny glimmer of hope
Iβm just lonely in my quest to liveΒ
Broken, but you canβt tell by my appearance
I look like Iβm all together
It affects me like brain damage
Iβm Fighting A polluted mind
Desperate for answers
I cower in the corner
Seeking peace would come more effortlessly
Shaded from the sun, blinded before it began
Iβm just hopelessly waiting
Taking my last breath to a leaping depth
I never felt so tense, nothing makes sense
Traveling to another place, showered in lace
Fragments of death upon the theft
Nothing feels right, my chest breathes so tight
Everything takes shape, but never feels straight
You lend a helping hand,
from beneath the liars chair that you stand
Take my hand, and weβll break free from this land
Beautiful seascape storm
Centred around my base
Categorised by form
An Internal left out space
Crying in the bathtub
Dreaming of my death
A craving I yearn for,
But not yet want
Loosely divulging into my spiral
A ghost lost but unprepared to aspire
With each sallow I took the chance
But ended up regretting my choice
Yet that yearning still haunts me
Day in, and day out
An outcast fighting for true belonging
How did I make it here,
So far away from you?
How did I lose so much?
Breathing battered breaths,
From longing depths
Nothing seems to drain my mess
Begging to eliminate my stress
Why do I favour contempt?
Why canβt I see myself different?
Always confused, in a deadly doom.
Maybe tomorrow will change
I feel so disconnected
Everyone feels so distant
The world seems fragmented
I could disappear in an instant
Creepy crawly crawling on me
Dead till the end, the depth of despair
Never breaking forward to meet the air
Forever locked in a long lost battle
Forced to freeze in an up fold shatter
I will never be the same in this endless pain
Why must the wind howl like a dog desperate for air?
The tone in my voice becomes relentless and bare
Together they bend to train their stare
Forever Iβll learn Iβm born to scare
All this taming doesnβt seem fair
Iβm lonely in this world bound to tear
Why did I teach myself to care
I hit the ground as hard as possible
Searching for something left unfound
I want more, Iβll always want more
But Iβm afraid – maybe things werenβt meant to go my way
I hit the ground while I was searching for something that wasnβt meant to be found
Washing the clarity from my mind
Intense dread runs through to find
A longtime I tried to be kind
But now Iβm hopeless only to remind
You of what comes behind
Iβm watching you break in my mind
Iβm watching myself turn blind
Bending, and breaking into the grind
Something I could not define
A love lost in time
