You seem so bitter
When really you’re just busy
Watching the stars
Gazing in bars
Tasting the cars
To treasure the litter
Yeah I’m just litter
Treasuring the fitter
You can never save me
From the setting sun
Setting sun…
Severe my staging state
Never meant to take
Forever bound…
Forever bound…
I say so long to the state I am bound. Goodbye…
I hope you can find the peace in your heart, the depth in the depart, something that brings us back to the start, and the empty crevasses that keep us apart.
Everything drifts into silence, I speak but there are no words.
I search for the light. They say that it’s there. So I know that it’s there. But my eyes don’t wanna see.
The need for belonging continues to drift with the feeling of empty, meaning I don’t have the need to belong.
There’s the numb divide between me and you. You deafen what’s truth, and what’s lie. The medication, or Even the zaps couldn’t clear you from my mind.
There will never be time in this life to bring back the sight that unknowingly blinds the windows of this house. Perpetuated, sometimes insinuated, blacken the depth beneath your gaze. For your gaze crucifies me in an attempt at being heard. Nothing can beckon the strength to pull through. I’ll lie here damaged, ditched, and dead on the floor.
Why? Why must things be this way? We must suffer to know pleasure. Freedom comes when we are one with ourselves. But I’m shattered in little pieces.
I’m traveling and I don’t know where I’m going. Strangled by knowing. I’m becoming by drowning. How I’m always drowning. Pounding my drum through.
I’m terrible, totally trashable. Dancing on ice, I fall more than twice. Slow cooked crooked damned man, never knowing what comes next. Frozen in an everlasting space. Begging just to escape. Sinister solemn souls bare bold on my back bone, nothing can touch me, and I mean not even you.
Nobody ever would dare to spare the salty tears that dance down your face. your hands kiss your cheeks as they wipe the tears away. The words leave your lips, and I’m crucified by your gaze. Lazy days and long lost words play on my mind. Hoping that it’s not all in my mind.
So deductive, mind blown
Wish I could of seen
That I was not unseen
Frozen shivers run down
My spine
Sorry I missed that line
Can you say it clearer
Because it haunts me
Not knowing
Crowded, haunted, surrounded. it sounds like the voices in my head, I got to get away – before the violins play. They play for each tear that drops, they play for the sadness within my heart, and they play for the long lost dreams that never quite made it.
A million words could surpass me, but the ones that stick are those that come with a thorn.
The lightning sustains me
The thunder bereaves me
And the Rain always misbehaves
I heard there was something to say when someone had hurt you so.
I don’t know these words, but I don’t know, maybe you do.
I wonder if you’ve shared such words with me before
But I was too naive to know
I’m just trying to love you, any way that I can
But you’re already somebody’s baby
I’ve been so sad lately
And I don’t want to disappoint you
But I’m not the person you’re looking for, you know you’ll always want more
Name your top three pet peeves.
My first pet peeve would have to be people who are dishonest about important things. I know that sometimes lying is needed in certain situations, and that’s okay. But because I suffer from a mental illness with psychotic symptoms, it can be hard to tell what’s real from what’s not, so it means a lot to me when people tell me the truth.
My next pet peeve is sometimes I am treated differently because I suffer from a mental illness. Almost like I’m much more fragile than a normal person.
My last pet peeve is a serious one, I hate it when people make a scrape noise on carpet. To me it’s the most awful sound I’ve ever heard, also I don’t use the word hate lightly.
I have to say, as someone who suffers from insomnia I am more of a Night person unless I stay up all night until morning, then I am a very grumpy Morning and Night person haha!!
Strapped back, stuck in the back
Fronting the elements in the great contusion constructing my body
Nothing enters without leaving, nothing stays without going. They all move forward, while I move backward.
Sunshine aches on the back of my bones
Broken by the backbone of the stones
Stolen by a form of broken place
Rubbing the last existence of my face
There was never anything
That could explain everything
I feel the jealousy sting
Hope there won’t be any bling
It’s nice to hear the birds sing
Both the Beach, and the Mountains are very beautiful places. But my heart belongs to the Beach, as I grew up very close to the beach and it has been a very big part of my entire life. Also I am very unfit at the moment so I don’t think I could walk up any mountains at the moment, need to get back into shape so I can take a trip to the mountains.
It still stings under the water, why does this always happen to me? the self loathing
I’m always desperately trying to make it to the surface to grasp for air
But you’re holding my leg pulling me down back into the depths of despair where my tears created this ocean.
You have forsaken me, left me in the ditches to rot and burn with the fire you left behind. Crying to be rescued, I pull myself up from the dirt but not without the 3rd degree burns.
Feel the freshness of the breath blowing on your face, the breath of this spring day, dancing around your fears. You’re finding things troubling, she wonders if fact is fiction, is it all in her head.
What’s the first impression you want to give people?
Put simply the first impression I would want to give people is ‘A Good impression’
But how do you give people a good first impression, and how do we avoid a bad first impression. To be honest there are many factors that can contribute to what kind of impression you give people. The way you smell, the way you dress, the way you act etc.
Even though a good first impression is the first impression I would want to give people, I think it’s important to try not to judge someone solely on their first impression. A person who gives a bad first impression could be a lovely person, and a person who gives a good first impression could be someone who’s not a nice person. Basically I think you should get to know someone before coming to conclusions on who they are.
The Memory of you, so sweetly gazing through the window. Day dreaming, I always wondered what you were thinking. The memory of you, watching the clock everything done on the dot. The memory of your chocolate stash, the one I would have loved to snatch. The memory of you becoming so fragile and weak. I must admit it was hard to say goodbye, but I will always have my memory of you.
The light was out of sight
The darkness was the opposite from bright
The walls caving in so tight
I keep thinking nothing feels right
I might begin my flight
Swiftly but surely I’ll stroll by the hole in my heart
I’ll staple it back to the start
Oh, how love plays such a part
I never thought this would happen
I imagine you lying on your side
with a stitch too strong to undo
Because of me
Everything goes black
And I’m slowly walking toward the door
Definitely reaching out for more
As I go to turn the handle
Nothing feels the same…
What’s on the other side?
Alone, Alone again. Dance in the sand. No-one knows I’m bare. Sending splendour in something so rare. Nobody can take this control, not even them. The one that dares to live inside of me. I tell them to go away, but they do nothing but stay. I call you the evil in me. I try to say goodbye to that part of me, but the thoughts still thunder through my mind…Intrusive thoughts.
Trust in the way that you betray
My memory is not clear, use it to your advantage
Do you really believe anyone deserves this all
Why is the voice singing, why is it clinging
All this pain leads to dreams stinging
I can take it if I want to
Slippery and slowly scraping by, maybe I’m done. Maybe I’m no fun. Maybe I don’t even see the sun. Sobbing in the backseat…The front seat is taken.
Dead in the night, left me in so much fright. Gone outta sight. A fight with the light.
Watching the faces, flow through these places. Gemini or Cancer, I don’t know the answer. Butterflies flutter and shutter, executing me and leaving me lonely. If only I had known before it was too late. Cleaning the slate won’t be as easy as fate. So here I go, I say Goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye
Sowed together through the needle bloody, seemingly beating in a perfect rhythm. Edging on the empty sold out prism. He says ‘Present yourself’, but she never shows up. slowly each stitch starts to come apart.
Look at the sun shine
Watch it burn
Away all of your pain
Symptoms of time
Life left unknown
Watching the sun burn till we’re blown
The storage in my brain feels like it’s almost full. I process through all my negative thoughts, but I can’t delete a single one. Nothing about this is really any fun. Reliving every moment like sunburn from bathing in the sun.
It’s hard finding inspiration
You’ll see I’m always waiting
Looking for something breaking
Taking all my impaction
It’s a long life infraction
I’m losing favour
In the depths of this flavour
Please be my saviour
Intense behaviour
Total betrayer
You are the slayer
The damage is done, and life goes on.
But I didn’t think I’d be waiting this long.
I hear a melody in a delicate song.
Telling me everything I’ve done wrong.
I’m keeping the etiquette to stay strong.
While Remembering loosely I do not belong.
Hesitating while contemplating
So invading, my life’s upstaging
Fall from the caging, Freedom’s taking
Damage rebranding on a time left standing
Sticking to the story
I said I’m sorry
You think things are intended, when they aren’t
I can’t stand the glory
Did you hear all the rumours
I think they’re true
The walls you build to keep safe
There’s nobody here, in my dream, but you and me.
I can’t keep following without knowing
Give me peace, I am the only one here
Reality divided
Real and fact is not real and fact
As they say.
Poison, running through my veins
Attack and a lack of control
Never would I ever
My mind is lost and my heart is tossed. Stolen in an instant, I was no investment. Depreciating every day, my testament out on display. Pretending everything was gonna be okay. I was debating by the day, wondering what you will say.
Congratulations!
I’m saturated
Impulse on overdrive
Eye contact is scarce
Singing lullabies in my head
Much is lost with the dead
I wish everything was ok instead
Your distress is dressed to impress
Instant attack, takes me aback
Good luck to something that will suck
Front and back, your lack of trust is engraved
Lonely and deprived, slowly divided
And Into nothing none the less
It’s the parts that’s frozen
It’s the starts that’s chosen
You left your mark
Like a timid shark
Soft with a mean bite
I’ll be out of sight
Situations lost
But at what cost
You say to forget
But I have all this regret
Situations lost
And it was at a cost
I can’t forget
And you can’t erase this regret
Schizoreflective 